A piece of time, a piece of memory

For several years I’ve carried around with me a birthday present from someone once important to me in the past.
To me, it stood for what a relationship should not become and a constant reminder of how I should treat and treasure the people around me.
I believe every relationship teaches something about ourselves and I’ve learnt the most from this person.

A month ago I lost that last significant piece of memorabilia from that once important person.
A part of me hoped that it will turn up some time, some place, as it stood for so many things I’ve gained and lost.
There were so many occasions where I’ve stood by the bin wondering what to do with it.
But I never did manage to convince myself to dispose of it, as the past it reminds me of, whether pleasant or ugly, remains important to me.

But since the memorabilia has disappeared, a part of me felt unprecedented relief.
The item that I cannot bring myself to discard has as a matter of fate, chosen to make an exit from my life most discretely and without fuss.
Other than relief, my heart was just numb. There was no sense of guilt for losing it and no pity for the loss.

I knew before that I had to let go at some point, but I never knew when.
I think, however, this is the time.
It feels like the right time anyway.
By destiny, it was lost and has no desire to be found.
So now I can finally let go of everything associated with it and from today onwards, I shall never look for it again.