I love fat cows!!

My colleague Ruth knew that I was homesick and invited me to stay at her place last weekend. Because of my ‘jar-par-lang’ English (Sg-US-UK pidgin with no logic whatsoever) there were so many funny moments, like the time when I exclaimed ‘These pants are great!’ in M&S and got horrified looks from Ruth and Andy (her hubby) because “pants = underwear” and the pair that I was pointing to should have been called TROUSERS. *roll eyes*

She is so English in the way she speaks that whether it was in college or at her place that I sometimes have to do a double take to catch her meanings. A typical conversation (E.g. preparing dinner at her place last sat) will be like this:

R: Do you want full cow or half cow?
Me: Full what?!? (thinking of the beef that she has just popped in the oven)
R: Full cow of half cow? What will you like with your tea? (bemused grin forming) You’ve never heard full-cream milk or semi-skimmed milk called this way?
Me: Never heard milk called that way before…. (laughs and shakes head) but half cow will be fine thank you. I love having tea with Carnation milk, that’s the way my mom has hers at home.
R: We call that fat cow.
Me: (Burst into laughter)…. Carnation’s not fat. It’s just concentrated, like cheese. You can put less of it in your tea if you like.
R: Yeah, but it’s still fat!! My sister is lactose intolerant and she takes fake cow – that’s soy milk.
Me: (nodds and getting the hang of things) So what do you call UHT milk?
R: Well, my Andy calls it -- Never seen a bloody cow!!

And so, I’ve learnt that I love fat cows with milk and heated half cows with cereals and my hall provides chilled never seen a bloody cow for breakfast. *LOL*

Ruth sometimes thinks that I’m funny in the head and as a compliment, I think she is too. =P