Rudolph Factory

If there is one place in London that produces Rudolph impersonators more than a month before Christmas, it has to be my lab.

Anyone in there for more than 15 minutes will come out with a red nose - mostly runny, accompanied by rosy cheeks for more permanent residents in the lab. And most will exhale and smile on exit, unable to mask their relief and delight in leaving the human freezing chamber.

A fire door separates our working world into the two hemispheres, warm summer climate on one side, and cold freezing winter on the other. Unfortunately, our working labs belongs to the less welcoming climate.

There are heaters, but they have either retired, or just warm to the touch. The ventilation fan which draws in the 5ºC air from outside is the single most important yet most hated device, because without it, we will not be protected from carcinogenic volatiles, yet because our heaters have not been working for the past 3 winters, we're effectively working in outdoors temperatures.

There were 3 huge ovens running in the bonding lab today, I took the trouble to wear 2 layers but I still could not prevent my hands turning red from indoor frostbite. In fact, I can barely feel my toes.

Why does my workplace, the place that me and my colleagues spend at least 7 hours a day, have to be a torture chamber? *sob sob*